Is It Just Me Or…
Normally, I would be writing a Coaches Corner this week but this long email came in from a doc and I felt the response he needs is something everyone would benefit from. The more I thought about it, the more the lines between an Ask Dr. Steve column and a Coaches Corner column became so here goes…
Firstly, the beginning of the email documented patient issues, staff issues, the deterioration of his practice and a lack of staff enthusiasm and follow-through. None of this was very pretty but then he asked the key question…
“I guess my thoughts are is this just happening in my office or is this widespread in your opinion?
If it is me, what is repelling people from me?
I am truly trying very hard to change my state, from readings, bible, audios, affirmations, prayer, psych-k, etc.
Daily trying hard to visualize my practice full, words etc – but the reality always pulls me back down.”
I know I’ve been where this doc is…how about you? So, let’s get to it.
Piece by bloody piece…first is it doesn’t matter if it’s widespread or not because this doc is experiencing it and the one thing he doesn’t need is an excuse because others are experiencing it too. I either hear reasons or results from my clients and when I hear reasons, I know they aren’t getting results and that has little to do with what anyone else is experiencing.
How do we become repellent to others? In my mind, this is simple from a feeling of being defeated or being needy or simply not wanting to be in the office yourself. Often times this is a result of worry and/or frustration. And, as we have reported numerous times, when these words come up, I always look to skills and resources. The question here is which skills would alleviate the worry and what resources would address the frustration. In this docs case, the skill of training his staff and having them black-belted in their skill sets would be a great step forward and have the resources of time to to this and an appropriate (trainable) staff would be huge assets. The good news is the practice is down so there is time if it’s spent in an effective way.
You cannot try and change your state…you either change it or you don’t and in this case he isn’t. The more important lesson here is that, as adults, our emotional state creates our experience whereas when we were kids it was our experience that created our emotional state. This is the most basic bit of philosophy that is critical for him/you to embrace. This is epistemology…one’s view of the nature of reality and we are either at effect of it or the cause behind it. This is a core bit from Bruce Lipton from the Biology of Belief….that we are either protecting or growing…one cannot do both at the same time. It is critical for this doc to change where he chooses to put his attention from what he doesn’t want to what he does want. And, that his actions must be entirely consistent with his more powerful and positive beliefs. This also goes back to BJ…all of our thoughts, actions, feelings, etc either create accumulative constructive survival value or accumulative destructive survival value.
And, last but not least on this topic is to take a vitalistic rather than allopathic approach. This issue isn’t fixed by a this for that but rather the whole system must be brought into balance starting with the doc and the staff. Reality is what is…it is not there to pull you down, it is there to show you the results of your efforts. If the results aren’t what you envisioned then it’s back to square one and the SuccessFormula:
What’s the vision for your practice?
What will need to be done to create it?
Why is THAT vision so important to you?
Do you have the resources to get THERE?
What’s your plan?
All of these items will be artfully addressed at the Annual Management Planning Seminar.
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